Dealing with Disappointment in Business

Everyone experiences disappointment in their life, but in business it can be especially difficult to overcome when you believe in your work or business so much and feel let down.

Some of these disappointments are huge (turned down for a speaking gig) and others are minor but just feel big (your computer crashes just as you finish that blog post). I believe that the real source of our disappointment is a lack of perspective.

Let me tell you about one of my first “big” disappointments. The first time this happened to me, I was in a funk for the rest of the day…

It was just over 2 years ago and I was writing an ezine about legacies. I talked about the fact that on Veteran’s Day (Nov 11th here in the States), we honor the men and women who served for an ideal, for a purpose bigger than themselves. And I shared a little about how we all strive to do that in our business as well.

The ezine went out on Wednesday as scheduled and just like that I had an unsubscribe in my notifications. What was worse (or just felt worse) was the comment that the person did not like my reference to veterans.

I was crushed. I felt like a total failure. As if I was insensitive and stupid and I should just give up.

Then I got a little perspective. Maybe this process will help you as well:

1. Feel the disappointment. It’s not healthy to avoid dealing with painful things so I simply acknowledge the “ouch” and sting of the comment.

2. Put it in perspective. One piece of disappointing news does not mean you’re a failure. Less than 1% of my list disagreeing with an example I used does not mean I was a horrible person.

3. Acknowledge their choice. It’s easy to get caught up in blaming the person who turns you down for an interview or chooses not to work with you. Instead approach them with kindness. They have the right to their own opinion even if it differs from yours.

4. Remember it’s okay. I don’t have to tell you how many times famous people failed before they became successful. There is no overnight success, and we all have our ups and downs. It’ll be okay. Even on the days when you really need that new client, you’re working hard to build your list or someone doesn’t approve of your choices.

5. Protect yourself. I learned another important lesson that day… I didn’t need to be notified of unsubscribes. We keep an eye on them so there’s an upward trend or an abnormally high number we can make tweaks, but I don’t need to see that information every day. This doesn’t mean sticking your head in the sand – oh no – you have to be willing to address problems without exposing yourself to a daily barrage of negativity and unhappiness.

Disappointment can feel like the world is telling you to give up and stop trying. When you address the situation and handle it, you’ll find yourself stronger in the end.